It was July 2nd and at about 1:30 PM, we would become Mr. and Mrs. Sriner. The morning went quickly as we got dressed and packed up what we needed for the ceremony. We arrived at the church about noon and Cindy Luton was there waiting for us. We had decorated the day before and Bill Schnake had already set up the sound system, so we were basically ready to go. Family started arriving and Cindy took us into the office to sign the license. Marilyn had one of her long-time friends act as a witness. I had similar plans for the second witness but unfortunately my “old” friend, Dick Neu could not make it. The substitute I had picked, Dennis Thread, a former student and good friend was apparently running late. Fortunately, Kim was there early, and I drafted her friend Chris Pugh to make this official.
It was time to get this show on the road!
The wedding was to start with a welcoming from me. Yes, I know that is not the normal procedure but I have never been accused of being NORMAL!
After a Tap .. Tap … on the microphone to get their attention, the following flooded the sanctuary.
” Welcome friends. If you are here today, it is because we cherish your love and support as we embark on this new adventure in life. You can tell from the 50’s and 60’s music, that we are setting the stage for a “Not-so-ordinary” wedding ceremony. What do you expect from an old couple with 98 years of marriage under their collective belt?
There is only 1 woman alive that could get me to overcome my anxiety enough to sing them a love song in person in public. Marilyn, this is for you!
Bill, cue the band and stand by with the backup singer in case I falter.
Elvis is in the building!”
Knowing how nervous I might be, I previously recorded myself singing “Love me Tender” by Elvis Presley for Bill to play in the background to get me started. As I started singing, Bill was to fade out the recording and I was to take over. If during my entrance, I were to lock up, he could bring it back up and I could simply lip sync. When I reached the front of the sanctuary, Marilyn started down the aisle escorted by her Grandson Luke Wood. She looked so beautiful and HAPPY! Midway down the aisle, she dropped his elbow and held his hand. It was obvious there is a special bond between the two of them. I am proud to have him in my extended family.
As Marilyn made her way up the aisle and I was singing away, Cindy gently motioned for me to move closer to her. If you are and introvert, you know how hard it is to be interrupted while doing something taking all your concentration. I moved closer. She pulled again. I gave her that “Don’t interrupt me look” and continued singing to the end of the song. At that point, I realized what she was trying to do. I WAS ON THE WRONG SIDE. I acknowledged my mistake and moved to her other side.
After a greeting, Cindy offered the following reading:
A reading from Kahil Gibran…
You were born together and together you shall be forever more.
You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days.
Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness—
And let the winds of heaven dance between you.
Let it be rather a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each of you be alone.
Even as the strings of a lute are alone although they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not to near together.
For the pillars of the temple stand apart.
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.
After a guided prayer, Cindy followed with a very inciteful description of marriage.
“True marriage is more than the joining in the bonds of matrimony of two persons. It is the uniting of two souls already attuned to each other. When such a true bond already exists between a man and a woman, it is good that an outer acknowledgment be made. That is the real purpose of this ceremony.
Dulany and Marilyn, we are here to bear witness to your entry into the close relationship of husband and wife…a relationship that symbolizes the harmony of the soul and the oneness of spirit.
This is a blessed privilege and a spiritual responsibility. You already know that nothing is easier than saying words and nothing is harder than living out their meaning day after day. What you promise here today must be renewed and re-decided tomorrow…and tomorrow, and the day after that. Your marriage is the product of your love. It must be nurtured, cherished, and cared for by each of you, that it may grow and flourish and be a blessing and a comfort to you both.
Love is the eternal essence and spirit of oneness. Real love lives beyond the warmth and glow, beyond the excitement and romance. Love liberates. It sets each of you free to become your best self in the presence of the other. Love makes your burdens lighter because you divide them…and your joys more complete because you share them.
Your love will make each of you stronger so that you can reach and become involved with life in ways you dared not risk alone. This commitment of marriage is significant – serious and sacred… not to be taken lightly…and is made under the guidance of Divine Love as it is expressing through you.”
At this point, she indicated that we had our own vows to share with each other. We had kept these vows secret from each other so I had no idea what Marilyn would say. During the previous weeks, she had hidden away in the bathroom or closet to practice what she had written. I on the other hand had rewritten mine numerous times. She wanted to go first. I waited in anticipation.
My dear Dulany, I used to think that we found one another by chance, but now I know, without a doubt, that the universe put us together because we were meant to spend our senior years loving each other. Today marks the start of the rest of our life. I know it will never be enough time for us, but the memories we build will sustain us.
I promise to faithfully nurture forever the amazing and rare understanding we have of one another.
I promise not to take for granted that you have given me your heart and your love. I intend to embrace it fervently.
I also promise to be a part of all your adventures and to encourage you to follow your dreams. To make you laugh when you’re taking yourself too seriously, and to always hold your hand through the good times as well as the bad.
Because honesty is what made this relationship thrive,
I cannot promise –
to always have my phone with me,
to always answer your texts immediately,
or to always respond to your Facebook posts.
But I do promise to always laugh at your jokes, even at the ones told by the 7th-grade boy inside you.
You fill my life with joy, laughter, passion, and contentment. At this time in my life, I am happier than I ever imagined I could be, and I feel loved by you every single day. When all our tomorrows are quickly becoming yesterdays, I want to look back on our life together and reminisce about the countless adventures we have to cherish.”
From this day forward, I will walk beside you. You are my best friend, my anchor, and my confidant, and I am proud and honored to become your wife and soulmate.
WOW, I replied,” That will be a hard act to follow!” I followed with my vows, not nearly as well prepared.
“When I think back to my first wedding ceremony, one thing comes to mind. “ Left hand, Left hand, any finger will do” These were the words of Pastor Roth as I tried to place the ring on Pat’s finger. I was shaking so much I just couldn’t hit the target. The whole ceremony is still just a blur as if I were not even really there. Today, I am here in body, mind, and spirit! I promise to always be here with you and for you.
That first real kiss we shared over 3 years ago, took me back over a thousand years to another life we had together. I knew then that our chance meeting was destiny at work. I have often said, Love never dies, but at that instant, I knew it was true. Love is timeless, Love is boundless and Love never forgets. I loved you then and I love you now. I never stopped loving you nor will I ever stop loving you throughout eternity. I promise to accompany you on this new journey called the golden years, sharing all that I have and all that I am.
May the Light manifested by our love, illuminate each other’s souls and bring new meaning to Love everlasting. I promise to Love, nurture and respect the spirit in you till all our tomorrows are yesterdays.
At this point, Cindy led us through the customary “I wills” and followed with:
“May I have the ring(s), please?”
I reached into my pocket and acted like I didn’t have them. You know I have to try for a laugh every once in a while. I handed her the rings. She continued.
“These rings by their shape are the symbol of eternal love, without beginning or end. The substance of which they are made represents purity which shall ever characterize your thoughts and feelings for one another. You wear them as a symbol of your love for one another, of your commitment in marriage and of your unity – mind, heart, body and soul. In the years ahead you will look upon these rings countless numbers of times – may they always be a reminder of the sacredness of these moments.
May they be worn in peace, in love, and in joy always.”
We all sang the “Peace Song” together and then she pronounced us Mr. and Mrs. Sriner.
Marilyn picked up her bridal bouquet and separated out the three pink roses. I picked up three packages from the table and we walked over to my daughters Krystal and Kim. Marilyn gave each of them one of the roses as a symbol of not only her love for them but in remembrance of their Mom. Each rose included a printed card as shown below.
I took one of the roses and gave it to Marilyn’s daughter, Christie with a similar card. To her sons, I gave a similar token in the form of a swiss army knife. I have always carried one and their Dad liked and collected pocket knives. It seemed like an appropriate token.
After sharing these tributes and a few tears in the process, we left the sanctuary full of Love and the happiness it generates.
Throughout this ceremony we have tried to convey a message of the permanence of love. Loves we have had previous to this time don’t simply evaporate due to the passing of time or lives. I believe Jim and Pat were there with us as we joined our souls together for what time we have left in this lifetime. May they rest in peace knowing we are happy and will always remember them.
If you would like to see the video of the entire ceremony click SEE WEDDING CEREMONY
It has been three weeks now since the wedding. We are slowly settling back into our normal routine and all is good in the Sriner household. While it would be nice to find a place that would truly be OUR HOUSE, it just is not the best time to buy a house. We both believe that we will be guided to make the move when it is time but for now, this will be our house. I have moved much of my better furniture and other stuff into the lower level family room of the house. I am slowly adding my touch to places like the garage and kitchen. The garage is small by comparison to my garage on Lowell but by adding a tool hanger bar along one wall and cleaning off the workbench, we will make it work. My garage on Lowell will remain my workshop for now.
I brought over a lot of my cooking items along with the rolling cabinet I had in my kitchen on Lowell and we set the cart up as a coffee bar to open up some additional counter space. Yesterday, I added pull out storage drawers for the lower cabinets in the kitchen. If you are nearing or past my age, you understand when I say, ” I just don’t bend like I used to.” Getting pots and pans out of that lower cabinet becomes a major undertaking. These additions make a great deal of difference.
If you know me, you know how I like projects. I am already thinking about changes to the back deck and patio. I’m not sure how I can get an Olympic sized pool in there but I’m working on it. Life is good and always remember LOVE IS THE ANSWER!
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